an email this morning...
honestly, we probably have enough serious writers, at least "straight"ones. we could use more - couldn't we ? - deeply committed and weird ones, where weird, queer, freak all come together - writers marked other by their distinctive,dogged pursuit of...of what? not quite independence, i guess juliana calls it "autonomy". a collective autonomy - ooh, its a good one, and i'm pretty sure most of our desire to be serious is just some bully authority voice that is a smoke screen - creates resistance. not a smoke screen only, also a fearsome mirage - always threatening our extinction if we don't write real! deep! hard! beautiful! intelligent! difficult!or whatever box we put our work/life into.
that was a big part of why i didn't write this wknd. the stakes were too high, too desperate.
also, my life was a mess. my bike was stolen, i got in a fight w/ my moms, sarah is insane w/ worry over her new job, and now, to top it all, i have writers block?(actually i wanted to edit)
a friend recommended - wisely - just write for a few minutes, say 6. see how it goes. if it goes okay, write for 6 more, etc. gentleness. too often we are fighting the war on terror in our own bodies, ten seconds after waking, at work, on lunch break, out w/ a friend, watching bad TV, and in our dreams. the humbling part of mindfulness practice is to see how rarely i am in sync with my body/environment, how often i am creating noise (actually, creating noise is very much in sync with the human environment of the city, on one vividly perceived level - its not an accident that the Brooklyn zendo of MRO is called the Fire Lotus) - static, more smoke screens, but its a deep sadness, a deep suffering and ignorance that drives me to all the work of creating Darth Vaders, running away from Darth Vaders, fighting Darth Vaders, etc.
these are my 10:22 am thoughts. how are you and erik?
will talk about the book in person - also, take the name of your pet growing up (favorite one), and the name of the street you grew up on (the one most like "home").combine these together and you get your porn star name. a german friend passed this on to me. mine is ace danbury, sarah's is winnie drumlin. although winnie drumlin seems more like the girl in harry potter who died on the toilet to me, rather ed gorey (comically maudlin). ace danbury though, i could go in to business w/ that one.
k
that was a big part of why i didn't write this wknd. the stakes were too high, too desperate.
also, my life was a mess. my bike was stolen, i got in a fight w/ my moms, sarah is insane w/ worry over her new job, and now, to top it all, i have writers block?(actually i wanted to edit)
a friend recommended - wisely - just write for a few minutes, say 6. see how it goes. if it goes okay, write for 6 more, etc. gentleness. too often we are fighting the war on terror in our own bodies, ten seconds after waking, at work, on lunch break, out w/ a friend, watching bad TV, and in our dreams. the humbling part of mindfulness practice is to see how rarely i am in sync with my body/environment, how often i am creating noise (actually, creating noise is very much in sync with the human environment of the city, on one vividly perceived level - its not an accident that the Brooklyn zendo of MRO is called the Fire Lotus) - static, more smoke screens, but its a deep sadness, a deep suffering and ignorance that drives me to all the work of creating Darth Vaders, running away from Darth Vaders, fighting Darth Vaders, etc.
these are my 10:22 am thoughts. how are you and erik?
will talk about the book in person - also, take the name of your pet growing up (favorite one), and the name of the street you grew up on (the one most like "home").combine these together and you get your porn star name. a german friend passed this on to me. mine is ace danbury, sarah's is winnie drumlin. although winnie drumlin seems more like the girl in harry potter who died on the toilet to me, rather ed gorey (comically maudlin). ace danbury though, i could go in to business w/ that one.
k
posted by Kyle at 10:29 AM
2 Comments:
Iku Lemuel
Dylan
tickle spring valley
it's a little like my dharma name...
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